Sunday, September 30, 2012

Retail to the Rescue!

So this not drinking thing has really sucked lately.  I mean REALLY sucked.  I haven't fallen off the wagon, don't panic, but I thought about it.  In my mind I had planned my perfect wagon leaping drink - champagne.  And of course I would have to do it all by myself because I can't even begin to imagine the look on anyone's face I would dare to cocktail in front of.  See, part of the reason I'm so public about it is accountability - this way I can't sneak one by anyone.  A very clever thought at the time the decision was made, but now it pisses me off.  In a good way.  Does that make sense?

Anyway I'm not going to go into why it's so hard, mostly because I'm still trying to figure that one out.  I will say that it is difficult, even after over a year of success, to be the only girl at the table with a seltzer.  Please keep in mind my friends are great and I'm so lucky to have them, but it's difficult taking this on alone.  Not that I'm alone, but my main sober support lives in RI and I'm struggling locally.  My RI support, we'll call her D.D., is amazing, and I can't thank her enough for helping me through these past few weeks.  OK enough about that.

The reason for writing this is what I did to drag me out of my blue mood today....

I went shopping.

Cliche, I know, but good god it works really well!

I am the most practical shopper ever.  I hate to buy things at full price - I'm a great bargain hunter.  Also, I don't buy anything unless I ABSOLUTELY love it.  That means, when I look in the mirror, it's never a "Mmmmm, maybe...." kind of thing.  If it's not an immediate "LOVE IT" then it goes back.  This is my shopping theory.  Also I have to be able to wear it in at least 3 different ways for it to make the grade.

So I ended up with a new pair of jeans....SKINNY jeans.  Whoever came up with this marketing plan is brilliant.  I could have bought a size 326 and it still would have been labelled "skinny".  Psychological genius.  It worked for me.  And by the way, have I ever mentioned that I am "Joanne Average"?  You know that group of people who most marketing is directed toward, the average sucker in every crowd?  That's me.  Even the impulse buy section at the cash register - I find myself thinking "Oh my god, I totally need that shake weight I saw advertised on TV!  Look, it's right there!  I will do it every day and have amazing Linda Hamilton circa Terminator 2 arms!"  This is when my shopping theory saves my life and Sean's wallet.  Works every time.

Back to my original story - I came home with my new SKINNY jeans, and a cute sparkly top on sale, and some fun size Twix (they were by the register.  No judgement).  Fast forward a few hours when I'm upstairs helping the boys get ready for showers when I decide IT'S FASHION SHOW TIME and I try on my new SKINNY jeans with many outfits.  Right now I'm in outfit #6.  May I just say how cute these SKINNY jeans are with heels?  All sizes?  2 1/2 inch to 6 inch - no problem!  My SKINNY jeans are faboo in every situation!  I think that before I go to bed I will break out at least 6 or 7 more pairs of shoes.

In any case, it is a cliche, but for me, a little shopping saved the day.  A little shopping and a lot of costume changes.  And D.D.


  1. Honored to Help! You are amazing...why mute any of your amazingness, or gift with words with Poison Water ;)

    1. You are a wonderful example to me, doing the sober thing with style and grace. And fun. And your realism of the difficult journey is honest, refreshing, and very relatable. You are an inspiration!!! XO
      PS - LOVE the term "poison water". For me that's exactly what it is!!! GREAT WORDS!!!!

  2. It sounds like a little retail therapy saved the day. That has happened for me a few times lately, including my recent purchase of skinny jeans. I think it is an excellent marketing ploy! It sure worked for me.

    1. Me too!!! And I'm totally ok with it. :)