Wednesday, July 11, 2012

How Not to Lose Your Mind When Your Kid is Sick

So my 10 year old has been sick since Monday.  High fever and swimmers ear.  Totally separate things, before you even ask...we went to the doctor.  Anyway, I have been losing my mind in this house for the past few days and thought to myself "what a great opportunity to find ways to not lose my mind!"  So here are some ideas for you other stay-at-home Hot Mama O Ramas:

Do a make over.  On your children.  This really works best if one of your children does NOT have autism and sensory integration disorder - the neighbors may call the cops if they see you chasing your kid with a make-up brush.

Pedi on the dog.  Same concept as above, minus the autism.

Make over on yourself.  Try a new aqua blue smoky eye!  This works best if (1) you have a movie for your kids to watch - they don't need to see this - and (2) you have a ton of make-up remover.  You're gonna need it.

Show your kids your latest Zumba moves.  Close the curtains first - neighbors need not be involved.  Do NOT stop when your kids yell "Mom, stop!!!"

Chase the dog.  Around the house.  Kids will take part in this one.

Bring out the garbage.  Family Circus style.  Return to the house 1/2 hour later.  Not the best activity if your kid with autism also has anxiety, unless he accompanies you on your jaunt.

Decide on new paint colors for your walls.  Do NOT actually paint - you'll regret it the very next day.

Look in your fridge 12,000 times.

Decide what gourmet meal you'd make, if you could only get to the store.

Do a fashion show.  For yourself.  Again this one requires a movie for the kids.

See how big you can get your hair.  Then add "more hairspray" to your gourmet shopping list.

Put your undies in the freezer.  Then put them on.  Surprisingly refreshing.

Decide to get rid of your skin tags with Compound W.  Burn the skin all around the tag.  Not on purpose.  No I will NOT post the picture.

Open all your windows.  Then close them.  Then open them again.  This is a last resort activity, if you've already tried everything else, because this one really makes you feel like you're losing your mind even more.  Actually, scrap this one.  Forget I mentioned it.

That's just a start - there are so many wonderful things you can do to prevent mind loss!  But please, ladies and gents, whatever you do, do NOT clean the house.  Totally unsatisfying to the Hot Mama O Rama mind and doesn't aid in creative development.

Any and all additional ideas are welcome.  That is all.

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